Zero Posterity: The Story of E-Bey (AKA Lentol Soup: The Bane de Soleil)

A fairly constant refrain in this year’s NYC primaries is the failure of the City’s local papers to cover local political contests in their print editions.

In particular, two challengers to seemingly entrenched incumbents have made this complaint a centerpiece of these campaign. One is Wellington Sharpe, running (with my strong support) for the State Senate against incumbent Kevin Parker and the other is Doug Biviano, running (with my medium level opposition) for the Assembly against Joan Millman.

The argument has best been explicated in print by Rock Hackshaw, a supporter of both Sharpe (strongly) and Biviano (in passing).

As I’ve noted before, I don’t really buy the premise of this argument. The NYC press has never covered local races, even before the national trend toward dumbing down set in. But that fact is neither here nor there, because the local press has become is less and less important over time.

Even article after article of constant attention in the local press would not win Biviano, a janitor, a seat in the Assembly representing Brooklyn Heights. What might win it for him is mail and the elbow grease of door knocking. When the press (though generally not the dailies) sees evidence of that, they do tend to show some interest, and in actuality, Biviano has done better than many. Last year, Biviano’s Council race got a him a full blown post-election profile in the Observer, when that Paper had previously refused to acknowledge any of the race's serious candidates, except for Vito Lopez’s handpicked choice Steve Levin. (Biviano ran six in a field of seven, but was by far the most aggressive in attacking the only candidate who could have beaten Levin).

Some more funding and a bit more door knocking might also prove useful for Sharpe, who, last time I checked, was not without personal resources, but does not seem to have applied them as zealously to his campaign as he might (a great pity, given the great gobbling turkey he is running against).

The press is in business to make money, and, except when it comes to selling ads (at the local weekly level) local races don’t make them money.

This is especially true at the level of the dailies, where, except on Staten Island, too little turf is involved to interest readers even when a race has become hot.

Moreover, even with the limited number of primaries to cover, resources, which have diminished with each passing year, are such that covering every race is probably beyond the capabilities of the dailies. They will sometimes cover a race, but only after triage ascertains that it meets certain metrics.

Frankly, the press is not going to notice people who can't get noticed on their own. It may be unjust that the press doesn't cover races where little or no money is being spent, but it is not their job to create viable candidacies.

If a candidacy is viable, it will break through to the public, press coverage or not. And I should add that, these days it is easier than ever to break through the filter. Even a dimwit like Biviano recently managed to do so with a video tackling this very issue

One would think the dailies and better weeklies would at least go through the efforts of doing what Larry Littlefield suggested a “special election supplement section, referenced from a banner headline on Page 1…” The Times and Newsday used to put together such supplements. Which would require not much more than a sending out a questionnaire and compiling the results, but these days such efforts are virtually non-existent.

Why do I not expect more? Why do I think the press is, to some extent, justified in triaging its coverage of local politics (even though I would set the bar for coverage far far lower than is the current practice)?

Let me provide just two examples:

In the 50th Assembly District, longtime incumbent Joe Lentol is opposed by Andre Soleil.

Back in 2008, a column by Jerry Skurnik called “Who's Running?” inspired the following Room 8 colloquy:

SKURNIK: On Thursday, July 10, Party designating petitions were filed at the New York City Board of Elections.

This is the list of possible upcoming contested Primaries, based on the petitions filed. This list will be changed as candidates withdraw and/or removed from the ballot. There also may have been some errors made in compiling the list. I am including some commentary about some of the races. As usual, most contests are on the Democratic side….

…Brooklyn

Democrats…

…Assembly

…In the 50th AD, Assemblyman Joe Lentol is challenged by Andrei Soleil…
…State Committee

…50th AD Incumbents Steve Cohn & Linda Minucci are opposed by Assembly candidate Andrei Soleil & Andrea Jones….

GATEMOUTH: WTF is Andrei Soliel?

ROCK HACKSHAW: ANDRE SOLEIL ran for office before. He ran against Velmanette Montgomery on every line but Democratic (1996) for the State Senate.

GATEMOUTH: Thanks. So I assume it's some jerk from Ingersol or Whitman who thinks the entire district is in Fort Greene and Bed-Stuy, when in actuality the district's population is 58% white and 12% black. If he were at all serious, he would have at least found an Hispanic to run for female leader.

So, either a loon, or possibly put up by Tony Herbert (hence the Republican connection) or Kevin Powell to juice primary turnout in a particular area (or maybe by Ed Towns to wake up the Hasidim by giving Lentol and Cohn races).

But probably nothing that sophisticated, probably just a nut.

JERRY SKURNIK: Still another non-barker. I don't think the candidate running against Lentol has anything to do with Anthony Herbert. Since he did not file petitions to run for anything from any Party.

CHRIS OWENS: Andre Soleil has been around for years …He was also involved with Community School Board elections in District 13. Remember those?

GATEMOUTH: Of course I remember them Chris, I even urged people to write you in .

ANDRE SOLEIL:
No, I am neither "put up by Tony Herbert, Kevin Powell or Ed Towns. No, I am not a "jerk" from Walt Whitman or Ingersol who thinks the district is Black. I am very aware that the district is not a "Black" district. I am also aware that I am not limited by my racial characteristics, and that the new demographic of the 50th AD is also NOT limited by racial profiles. As to "jerk," I have been called worse things by better people.

As far as seriousness goes, I unsuccessfully looked for a Hispanic female; since race' effect on politics remains reality. We however, ran a Jewish male for State Committee, I am just a substitution for the nomination to that office. Yitchok Cohen, a friend of mine, declined nomination because he is honest, discovering that he was not in the district (missed it by two blocks in Williamsburg). Steve Cohen (sic) suffers the same problem, he has been out of the district for 10 years.

Your information is old. Andrea Jones, my friend and a Black woman, has also declined the State Committeewoman nomination and has been replaced by Rebecca Roy.

Let's talk demographics. I am a Black middle classed man with a J.D., M.B.A., who is a candidate for my Rel.D., an ordained minister, a practicing attorney, realtor, former college professor, home owner, off-Broadway producer, professional visual and performing artist, published author, with several years of governmental experience, and years of involvement with civil rights, environmental protection, and good-government charities, and and owner of several small businesses. My running mate is a married, pregnant, White, 10-year veteran public school art teacher, home owner, with a M.S. Education from Columbia University, BFA in visual arts, and environmental/community activist.

Have you seen the recent demographics of the industries-employment, academic achievement, earnings, and concerns of the active young populace of the 50th AD? May I suggest that these demographics fit Mrs. Roy and myself like a glove? May I also suggest that these new demographic types could care less about my race (see BARAK OBAMA)?

May I also suggest that these new residents, that have so radically altered the district's demographic, are also less than enchanted with Seneca Club politics, a out-of-the-district male leader, a "rubber stamp" unknown female district leader, and the hereditary Assemblyman whose family have presided over the two largest inland oil spills ever? This is not the working-class White district that originally elected the Lentol family. Remember the Barak-Hillary 'dream team" that we Democrats salivated about . . . well I got it.

Let's find out if the new demographic also means new VOTES on September 9, 2008.

If challenging the stagnant corrupt establishment makes me a "jerk," I'm a jerk.

GATEMOUTH: Sorry, Andre, now I'll do better.

I tried googling you, but Jerry misspelled your first name and all I got was this article and two piece of googly-goop, so I took wild guesses and said so. I regret my error.

Now that I've got the correct spelling, I've struck gold. Take this first entry from Erik Engquist in 2004: "Attorney Andre Soleil, who was trying to run as a Democrat against State Senator Velmanette Montgomery, vanished from the Board of Elections' list of candidates on August 13. It seems we'll be deprived of what would have been a colorful race. Not only was Soleil harshly critical of Montgomery, but one of his campaign themes was to allow parents to whup their children.

Parents should only lose custody of their children if they inflict "lacerations, broken bones, major contusions, things of that nature," Soleil told us. "Not swelling." He explained, "A few welts on the behind is not an indication of abuse."

The primary theme of his brief campaign against Montgomery was that she is ineffective. "We didn't create the office of Senate to elect our favorite grandma, have her smile at us, and have us call her senator," said Soleil, who in the last decade has been a Democrat, Republican, unaffiliated voter, Libertarian, and finally a Democrat again."

Another Engquist clip from 2004 indicates that you were part of a pro-Ratner front-group, which I'm sure will have great appeal to the "concerns of the active young populace of the 50th AD" who you "fit like a glove". But I guess you must target them, since the district's numerous poor Hasidim, Latinos and African-Americans, many of whom live in NYCHA Housing Projects, and are often dependent upon entitlements like Medicaid and Food Stamps, are unlikely to be interested in supporting a former Chair of the Kings County Libertarian Party. I'm also not sure your fellow African Americans will share your enthusiasm for Rudy Giuliani documented in the Daily News..

Your take on the demographics of the district has some salient points, nonetheless, they are points with a limit–the District went 54%-46% for Hillary Clinton, indicating that oldtimers still retain their majority. Further, Lentol not only will clean your clock among the old-style Clinton type voters, but he'll eat your lunch among the Yuppies.

No one is more aware of the district's changing demographics than Joe Lentol, who has let the shift liberate his inner liberal. In the last few years, Lentol has publicly and emotionally, in terms that show unmistakable contrition, changed his position on the death penalty and gay rights. His speech in favor of same-sex marriage could almost bring tears to one's eyes. If he were merely pandering, he could have cast the vote without the speech–one must assume it came from the heart, and given the district's still strong Hasidic and traditional Catholic presence, it took a bit of courage.

Finally, it should be noted that Lentol works hard. The top issues amongst all voters, oldtimers and new, in the Northside and Greenpoint are environmental–and Lentol's record on those issues ensures that he has a strong following amongst the district's newcomers. And, he'll even give you a run for the money amongst black voters.

So, Andre, the answer is that perhaps one day a newcomer will shake up politics in AD 50, though the presidential primary results indicate that the date has not yet arrived. When that date arrives, oldtimers who've been asleep might get surprised, but Joe Lentol has not been asleep. And if someone is to get surprised, it will be by someone in tune with the district's priorities, and I submit, based upon your record, that person is not you.

YODA: More about Mr. Soleil than anyone should have to know. Though, I'd like to ask Mr. Soleil if he really blames Lentol's family for the two largest inland oil spills ever?

ERIK ENGQUIST:
Sometimes we take Google for granted, but it's worth stating what may be obvious: it has completely changed the political discourse. Every candidate is an open book. Gatemouth (once he had the right spelling) found in a matter of seconds my postings on Andre Soleil, who four years ago gave me an interview that I'll never forget, and one that may haunt him forever. Because of Google, it will always be discoverable. But I will say that if Joe Lentol can change his position on gay marriage, Andre Soleil can change his position on corporal punishment.

GATEMOUTH: Perhaps you are correct, Erik, ..but before I'm convinced, I'd like to have ACS inspect for welts.

Sadly, in 2008, Andre’s petitions turned out to be of the same quality as his intellect, so we were deprived of opportunity to see whose theory of the primary race was correct.

An article from the time says that investigators from Lentol’s campaign suspected that Soleil’s campaign gathered signatures from dead people, people who didn’t exist, and people who didn’t live within the district. The case went to Court, but two days into the trial, Soleil’s lawyers said they wanted to settle and seeing the writing on the wall, Soleil agreed to drop his candidacy and the civil suit he had counter-filed against Lentol.

This year, Andre’s petitions, if not his IQ, seemed to have improved exponentially in quality, though I have an alternative theory.

The 50th AD is actually the site of a very spirited race for two District Leaderships, where the "reform" and "progressive" New Kings Democrats (NKD) have targeted the regular candidates. NKD has no particular beef with Lentol, who stood against Vito Lopez in Diana Reyna’s recent council race (according to City Hall News, Soleil is such a dedicated reformer, he actively sought Lopez’s support during the time Lopez was looking to dump Lentol), and whose diligence on local issues has gotten him a lot of support from local community activists NKD would like to have on their side.

It is the regulars who are jumping for joy about Soleil’s candidacy. In order to beat back the rapidly changing demographics of the area, they need a big Hasidic turnout, and a challenge to Lentol will certainly spur Hasidic interest exponentially. Lentol’s presence on the ballot doesn’t hurt bringing out the other regular-leaning oldtimers either.

The regulars persuaded Lentol not to challenge Soleil’s petitions. NKD would have been hard-pressed to appears as reformers if they did so themselves, and so did not do so either.

On his campaign website (on which Soleil can’t seem to make up his mind who his running mate is for State Committee) Soleil calls himself a lawyer, artist, and entrepreneur. Elsewhere, he says he is an attorney, realtor, Broadway producer and ordained Pentecostal Minister (in the Church of Jesus Christ) Soleil‘s MySpace page refers to him as "Reverend Counselor” with his name in parenthesis, while on his campaign website he refers to himself as "Apostle Soleil."

On Blackplanet.com, Soleil states "I am also a singer, artist, college professor and great cook. I have been blessed with a J.D., a M.B.A, Media Management, a B.S., Psychology, and a A.F.A., Illustration & Fine Arts (Painting). I am now working to complete my D.Min. I have had some very large jobs."

He goes on to note:

"I beleive (sic) in the active Spirit of God that heals, delivers and that signs, wonders and miracles follow those who beleive that Jesus is Lord. I am single, truthful and honest, and yes very sexually freaky, satisfying and enduring (or so I have been told). However, I have decided to save it for my favor – my eventual wife.

I am looking for my queen, but I am taking it a day at a time. Whatever comes natural is what happens, no lies, no manipulation. Just me.

I like SciFi, the fine arts and entertainment. In fact, my legal practice is focused on religious, entertainment, and recreation law.

So, drop me a note or sign my G-Book. May Yehushua Immanuel, Adonay, El Shaddai, El Elyon, Tsaddik Ha`Olam, Jehovah Jirah, Jehovah Nissi, Jehovah Tsinkinu, the Memra Ha Eloah, whom came to us as Jesus, the Bridegroom of the Shekinah (the Church), the Son of Elohim, who now sits in Zion and is given all power and authority bless and keep you. "

Although one should rest easily in the knowledge that Andre is currently using his endurance to preserve his precious bodily fluids, one cannot help notice that some of his excess juices have inadvertently spurted out in his prose.

According to his campaign website, Mr. Soleil is founder of L’arts Soleil, LLC., the theatrical production company that produced the 2009 off-Broadway play "Billie’s Blues, " and is also developing New York City’s soul noveau gourmet restaurant experience, "Ra" along the East River waterfront of Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Andre also says he is an former employee of both the Giuliani and Pataki administrations, proving his candidacy has the ability to cross cultural barriers and unite Yuppies with minority groups (albeit in revulsion).

On issues, Soleil is a puzzle, attacking Lentol, at turns, as being too supportive, and not supportive enough, of the housing development planned for the old Domino sugar site. Andre displays a similar confusion in the issues section of his website, where the former Republican-Conservative candidate and Libertarian Party Chair endorses a single payer healthcare plan for new York, saying it has worked in Massachusetts, which would probably be news to Mitt Romney.

Of course, if the Massachusetts plan qualifies as single payer, than so does the national plan just enacted, so why would New York need to adopt its own plan?

But Soleil does not merely proposes several new massive government programs, he also complains about the “lack of urgency” in Albany concerning “frugality when it comes to tax payer dollars” adding, “The budget situation in Albany is just another example of how the government has lost its way.”

Actually, despite his protestations to the contrary, Soleil’s campaign strategy seems mostly to be about attacking Lentol for paying to more attention to the 58% than to the 12% (even specifying Ingersoll and Whitman Houses), an assertion which is actually unfair. Soleil attacks Lentol for lack of concern about “stop and frisk”, even though as Chari of the Codes Committee, Lentol was a key player in passing the bill limiting police use of information gathered in such stops. Further, Soleil attacked Lentol, Lentol for lack of interest in HIV and Hepatitis C, even though Lentol’s record on those issues has been praised by advocacy groups concerned with those matters.

Thus, Soleil is a candidate of questionable sanity and major league ignorance, who is totally outside of any sort of ideological affinity with virtually anyone in the district, and possessed of no discernable resources, issues (except ones which contradict each other), or even address (Ed Koch could not locate Soleil to find out if he were a "Hero of Reform," or an "Enemy of Reform," and Soleil apparently made no effort to take the two minutes it would have required to find Koch).

Perhaps Soleil will now hook up with his pugilistic soul mate (as finding his other kind of soul mate seems so unlikely), Kevin Powell, and if victorious, form a caucus with those who share his casual attitude about violence; Hiram Monserrate may yet be victorious well, and together he, Andre and (G-d forbid) Kevin Parker may get to form "The Three Stooges" as the 2011 alternative to the Amigos.

But even Soleil shines like a mackerel at moonlight compared to Mark Escoffery-Bey (hereinafter “E-Bey“), who has filed petitions to run against State Senator Jose Marco Serrano (a fellow “Room 8” contributor, but then again, so is Ruben Diaz, Sr.)

According to The Bronx News Network (which managed to find him, even though Ed Koch could not), E-Bey owns and runs a copy store in Morrisania. "It's like Kinkos, but it’s not Kinkos." He is also a film-maker and a karaoke host at Bronx bars and restaurants. Further, the records of the Federal Communications Commission indicate that, in contrast to the braggadocio of Andre Soleil, Dr. E-Bey is so modest he never mentions that he holds some manner of advanced degree.

The records mostly concern the visit by agents to a building owned by Dr. E-Bey to attempt a "station inspection." They reflect that Dr. E-Bey, admitted that he allowed his friend Shawn to install and operate a radio station on 87.9 MHz in his building, but that he refused to allow agents to inspect the station.

Last year, E-Bey attempted to run for City Council against Councilwoman Helen Foster. "I made the ballot but then it was challenged and I was taken off…I take responsibly for that. I was new to the process and I didn’t know all the little nuances, so my signatures lacked integrity.”

E-Bey missed the Board of Elections hearing where he was knocked off the ballot and his lawyer was allegedly in and out of the room. "I guess that’s the game," E-Bey said at the time. "Even if I win the appeal, there’s no time to run a campaign. On the other hand, it’s not my nature to give in." E-Bey soon went on to prove this.

Not making the ballot did not stop E-Bey. The minutes of the October 27, 2010 meeting of the NYC Board of Elections are testament to the doggedness of Mr. Escoffery-Bey in his never ending battle for Truth, Justice and the American Way.

The minutes note that the General Counsel reported a correction involving the September 15, 2009 Democratic Primary for City Council in the 16th City Council District in Bronx County reflecting a missing write-in vote.

The Board had been served an Order to Show Cause returnable in Federal Court the day before its meeting by Brother T. Williams-Bey and Mark Escoffery-Bey, alleging the Board failed to give them the opportunity to write-in votes.

In preparing to defend the Board, it was found that Mr. Williams-Bey was not eligible to vote in that Primary because he resided in the 15th City Council District. Mr. Escoffery-Bey who was a candidate on the ballot, but removed by court order, stated that he wrote in his name. The Bronx Borough Office was directed to recheck the write-in canvass rolls in the 20th Election District of the 77th Assembly District.

The Bronx BOE staff determined that they recorded Mr. Escoffery-Bey’s name as a candidate for Mayor, Public Advocate and City Comptroller, but failed to include the City Council write-in which was at the bottom of the paper roll. Mr. Escoffery-Bey stated that as long as the Board records his write-in vote he was willing to discontinue the proceeding. Counsel advised the Federal Court that the Board would correct the inadvertent error. The Bronx Deputy Chiefs submitted an amended certification for the September 15, 2009 Democratic Primary in the 16th City Council District to show one write-in vote for Mr. Escoffery-Bey.

"I have no political friends," said E-Bey, poignantly (perhaps Mr. Soleil can direct him to Blackplanet.com) . "At political functions no one wants to be in a photo with me. I eat the food and go home."

Given the gregariousness of politicos in trying to win everyone they can over to their side, it may be that E-Bey is just shy. Evidence indicates that it was not only Ed Koch who could not find him. He has apparently failed to answer any candidate questionnaires from any group. Further, while most challengers complain that it is their opponents who refuse to debate, in this race, it was E-Bey whose busy schedule would not permit him to show up.

Most notable about E-Bey is not his delusion that he’s a candidate, but his delusion that he’s a film maker. E-Bey’s magnum opus (it is two hour and thirty five minutes long) is the appropriately titled "Zero Posterity", a title which neatly sums up both E-Bey’s likely legacy as a politician and creative artist (and would call to mind Soleil‘s current “voluntary” celibacy, if he had not already reproduced) .

The film concerns a man forced to take a paternity test who discovers that he fathered an eight-year-old boy with a woman that he has never met. Despite the film’s length, its trailer tells you everything you need to know about E-Bey’s non-existent talents as a writer, director, cinematographer, editor and actor (he plays the lead role in an extremely convincing imitation or rigor mortis), as well as his non-existent empathy for women and children.

Unlike Soleil, who is as generous with his opinions as he is frugal with his bodily fluids, it is hard to put one’s finger on what E-Bey stands for. There is almost no evidence whatsoever, beyond this video remnant of his aborted Council race, of E-Bey’s thoughts on any matter of publicly policy From the evidence on the video, E-Bey’s platform is best summarized as “Don’t Worry, Be Happy,” and his demeanor is best described as “Alvin Greene with pretensions.”

In E-Bey’s words, “we can have it all, right now.” E-Bey says he is “a bold leader” who will “touch, move, and inspire us to create a future where we can have anything we want for ourselves, our families, our communities and our district.” He favors efforts to “build good credits and keep money in our pockets.” He wants to “usher in an era of service and abundance.”

Most importantly, E-Bey is “committed to removing any barriers which gets in the way of your joy, happiness, freedom, full self-expression, safety and security, without compromising one for another.”

Perhaps he’ll even help Reverend Counselor find his Queen.

So, I submit, the decisions by the local press not to expend their resources examining Andre Soleil and E-Bay's pathetic masturbation fantasies (to clarify, those related to their quests for elective office) are totally justified by the facts on the ground. As to other candidates with what they think are better cases for breaking out of the field, think of press coverage as a “Field of Dreams.”

If you build it, they might come.

Incidentally, Gatemouth endorses Lentol and Serrano.