The Gateway (Fistic Pizza Edition)

GATEMOUTH (1/14/11): The best place to get a slice. Say, Whatever Happened To Hiram Monserrate's Queens Campaign Office? www.nydailynews.com

NY POST (4/11/11): Ex-senator Hiram Monserrate, accused of slashing girlfriend, now working at pizza joint www.nypost.com

Query #1: How many puns can one make using the word "slice"?

Query #2: Is it true that his pet name for Karla is "Pizza Face"?

 

 

Memo to Daily News: if you want this story to have any impact, it would help if you named names.

My G-d, I almost sound like Littlefield. State lammakers still sweet on public pensions www.nydailynews.com

 

 

The smartest man in America on the budget deal: "But the notion that Democrats were going to get a radically better deal, with Republicans having such a large and conservative majority in the House, is probably unrealistic. It’s also conceivable that they would have gotten a worse one — say $45 or $50 billion in cuts —… had Mr. Boehner made a bolder offer initially." An Imbalanced Budget Deal? fivethirtyeight.blogs.nytimes.com

 

 

The Kool-Aid Party budget; stillborn on arrival. No one enjoys a good masturbation fantasy as much as I, but I generally believe budgets proposals should have some basis in the facts on the ground, and this one would seem to be groundless. The People's Budget www.huffingtonpost.com

 

 

Bachmann’s hero is Ayn Rand, except in those rare instances when it's Henry Wallace.

I suspect my left wing friends will consider this a slur upon Wallace. Teabagger Queen Michele Bachmann Cashed In On $250,000 In Welfare – By Yasha Levine – The eXiled exiledonline.com

 

Appearances to the contrary notwithstanding, I did not take a job writing Ben Smith's jokes. Dept. of easy promises – Ben Smith www.politico.com

 

 

Gail Collins expertly debunks most of the incredible things Trump says here in her column to day, but one line here needs further thought.

“Bill Ayers wrote ‘Dreams From My Father'…I have no doubt about it. That first book was total genius and helped get him elected. But you can tell Obama did the second book himself because it read like it was written by somebody of average intelligence with a high school education.”

As Trump implied, "Dreams" is the work of a writer of true elegance and eloquence.

By contrast, Ayers memoir opens thusly:

"Memory is a motherfucker."

Actually, the idea that Senator Obama used the assistance of a ghostwriter on his second book, written for a campaign, is not all that implausible.

But the idea that an unknown law student did so to write a personal memoir is utterly preposterous. Opinion: Donald Trump doesn't give a damn – Joe Scarborough www.politico.com

 

 

Chait thinks Amerigo Bonasera is the perfect Republican Presidential prospect, but has anyone seen is birth certificate?

At any rate, Mitt Romney is an offer one can refuse. Mitt Romney Believes In America | The New Republic www.tnr.com

 

 

Tea Partiers find common ground with bicyclists in support of liberty, the pursuit of happiness and the right to run red lights (AKA “death”). 206 Partial Content www.tampabay.com

 

 

Memo to Orthodox Jews: ever wonder what these positions would mean to two parties who agreed with each other to have their case resolved by a Bes Din? 2012 candidates stake out positions on sharia – Ben Smith www.politico.com

 

 

Bye bye Braverman. Sidney Lumet, 86, Director of Modern Film Classics, Dies www.nytimes.com