Last week, on Room Eight New York Politics (www.r8ny.com), there were many complaints against me from some demanding people in blogdom. You see, I didn’t write a column for a few days, since I was down at the convention in Denver, Colorado. I made the decision that I will accumulate the info (notes, observations, interviews, etc.) I needed, and write columns all the way to the November general election; using Denver as a backdrop and/or a reference point. I assumed that it was my prerogative. Maybe I am wrong. Maybe I belong to the “twisted egos of blogdom” (on the other side of the fence that is/lol). But then I hate to be owned: slavery has been abolished I hope.
Just in case no one is counting, this happens to be my seventh column in ten days. And further, I have written over two hundred columns here in about two and a half years. This averages out to almost seven columns a month. And for those who always seem to be doubt my veracity, all one has to do is click on my picture and it goes straight into my blog archives. There you get an opportunity to run through any column you may have missed over the years.
All the way up in the mile high city of Denver, I read some of the unreasonable comments and smiled. Of course it was a smile of derision. Some people suggested that I refund monies that I was never even given for my trip. Others seemed to insinuate that I be tarred and feathered/lol. Some suggested that fees paid for me and my expenses (not true) be refunded from my almost empty pockets. A few appeared to feel that I was out there partying and drinking myself to death or something: and that I owed them. The general impression I got from reading those comments, was that I was obligated in some way or the other, to post regular and/or daily columns (plural) here on Room Eight New York Politics, like Gatemouth did. There seemed to be a sense that I was falling down on the job; and that here in blogdom, a regular dose of my writings is a dictate. Yes; junkies can be found all over the place -even in blogdom. Stalkers too.
Look; no one pays me a dime to write columns on any of the websites that choose to publish them. Beyond one airline ticket, I have never gotten tickets to even one Broadway play. My editors on both Room Eight and the Daily Gotham (www.dailygotham.com) are nice and friendly, but beyond an invite or two for coffee, from Gotham’s Michael Bouldin: I am on my own. And as much as I truly appreciate the love, hospitality and kinship from both Michael and Liz -when we were at the Blog Camp in Denver- they still do have their own objectives in this game (blogging), and I still don’t have much of a clue as to why I do this crap. Maybe my shrink could help me figure it out one day.
Ben Smith, Gur Tsbar and I have meant to hook up for years: we never have. I have seen Ben (Politico) a few times over the years, but our lunch, brunch and dinner plans have always fallen awry. Could it be they both know that they have to pick up the tab(s)? LMAO.
And Bouldin has other motives too; he wants to convert me into becoming a progressive. I intend to resist with all my might. I love being a moderate. I allow him the freedom to choose whatever columns he wants to put up. Many times he forgets to post my shit. That’s okay/lol. Sometimes (I suspect) they aren’t far enough on the left/lol/ to suit his ideals and tastes.
Liza Sabater is just such a beautiful soul; I have always gotten good vibes from her. Between Liza, Michael, Mole, and the other regulars on the Gotham crew, I have felt at home there, despite knowing that they are probably all too far on the left of the political spectrum for my pristine political tastes -way further left of the centrist post I have glued myself to.
Look; there is a saying that goes like this: “if you are under thirty and your politics isn’t on the left, then you have no heart. But if you are over thirty and your politics is still on the left; then you have got no head”. And I am not talking about the Monica Lewinsky variety folks.
Liza, Michael, Mole and the Gotham crew, probably all need to have their heads examined; but that’s their business.
My other editors (Ben Smith and Gur Tsbar) basically allow me the freedom to say whatever the fuck is on my mind, anytime I want to say it. They try to sell a little ad space to pay the bills of the site, and for the most part I believe (and trust) them when they say we don’t make much money here. And that’s fine with me. I remember once trying to negotiate a “superstar” contract when we did get some big bucks from a grant, only to take too long in contract talks. You know what they say about a client who uses himself as a lawyer (fool); well that was me in those talks. By the time I got around to accepting their offer, all the money had run out. Other writers on the site gobbled it all up. Still, I must admit that they have posted every column I have submitted over the years, without as much as a flinch. I hope they have lawyer-money/lol/ just in case some (one) of these knucklehead black electeds come after me. After all, I have been threatened a few times (with lawsuits for slander, libel, defamation of character and such). I could only hope that I am not found one day, beaten up in some dark alley somewhere. I am sure they will make it look like a mugging.
Over the years I have had folks come up here and criticize near every damn thing I write. Fine. I have had people (friends) like Chris Owens (who I respect immensely) becoming the blog police for my work -with admonitions to not fight anyone/lol. I don’t think I have done well in that regard. Sorry Chris (and I don’t hate you). Yesterday, some one said I need to “clean up my act”; whatever that means (and I wish they would explain it further). The electeds (especially the black ones) hate my guts. Most refuse to give me quotes. Others refuse to be interviewed by me; plain and simple. And others yet still wouldn’t be caught dead talking to me. I am treated like leper in some political corners of Brooklyn and beyond. I am despised in other corners and shunned by so-called political friends sometimes. Even Gatemouth kept me at arms length in Denver/lol. I observed that he went to all the Jewish events by himself. That’s fine too. I will remember him when the revolution comes.
If I am ridiculed so often, criticized so much, and near all the time derided like a cheap ticket in a humongous stadium; then how come my columns were missed that loudly; that badly; while I was away in Denver? It’s not easy being me: I swear.
It’s a tough road I am on, trying to carve out a niche as a political columnist (I don’t care for the term: “blogger”). New York is a rough city. Politics can be brutal at times. Sometimes you just have to be feisty like Kevin Parker; or cagey like Nick Perry. I guess sometimes you even have to play dumb like both Darlene Mealy and Tish James. Furthermore; I guess you have to fake it like Charles Barron does sometimes; one minute you are a black panther and next minute you are wearing black panties. Oh this life we choose!
There are a lot of extra-large egos in politics. They would cut you down in a second -if you let them. It is a sick game for those who love to get their hearts broken again and again. It’s an orgasmic journey for those who like to power-trip. It’s a challenge to those (like me) who despise power-trippers.
Point being this: no one has dominion over me since no one pays my freight. I write on these blogs because I feel like it. I write what I want to write and when I want to write it. Last time I looked, I had a constitutional right to do this. It’s all legal. I believe I have many wonderful stories to tell about the plays and the players in NYC politics. I know many of them. Some I know too well. I also feel that a lifetime of political involvement allows me the right to vent. I have political views that I like to espouse, and I also take political positions that I feel obligated to disseminate. I believe I am educated enough to cogently make my arguments. I believe I am brave enough to don’t give a damn sometimes (not all the time).
If I choose to not write for a day, a week, a month or a year; that’s my right. So please don’t say squat, just shut the fuck up and be patient. I will write when I feel like.
And stay tuned-in (if you want).