The $18 Million Dollar Man (AKA “Freddy Kruger”)

Multiple sources report that, encouraged by strong southern Brooklyn performances in recent elections, the State Senate Republicans are planning to take advantage of the much anticipated death of the monster they helped to create and make a real effort to grab Carl Kruger’s State Senate Seat and turn it Republican.

Gee, and I was hoping that my Party would take the opportunity to make a real effort to grab the seat and turn it Democratic.

The same reports also note that the hot Republican prospect for Kruger's seat is Fred Kreizman, currently the Assistant Commissioner of the Mayor’s Community Assistance Unit (CAU), who in honor of his Party’s efforts to buy the seat with taxpayer money shall hereinafter be known as the $18 Million Dollar Man.

Fred and I have something in common, as we both have Russian speakers in our households and have both served as Brooklyn Coordinator of the CAU.

What, you may ask is the CAU?

Well, when David Yassky told me the news he was going to be put in charge of Hacks, I thought he’d been named the CAU Commissioner.

Anyway, Kreizman, a young, self absorbed Hack on the make, was born to replace Carl Kruger. They have far more in common than just the first two letters of their last names.

LIKE KRUGER before his own election, Kreizman is a political operative drawing a government salary for being a political operative.

LIKE KRUGER before his election, Kreizman’s address is outside the district he wants to run in, and he is constitutionally ineligible to hold the position he seeks.

As I’ve reported more than once before, before his election Kruger was living with his adopted Italian family in Canarsie while registered to vote out of his sister’s house in Georgetown. Then, tired of waiting for a local office to open up, Kruger re-registered to vote from his Canarsie address in the hopes of succeeding of stumbling drunk State Senator Howie Babbush, who’d spent the prior decade under indictment, but too ill to stand trial.

After the “move” was accomplished, Donnie Halperin, the Senator representing Kruger’s once and future "legal" residence in Georgetown, took another job, and Kruger “moved” again, too late to meet the legal deadline, and won the nomination for the Special Election at a Democratic County Committee Meeting.

Pathetically, no one, including the Republican Party, had read the State Constitution, which (except in reapportionment years), requires a person to reside in their district for a year before they can seek to represent it in the State Legislature (or perhaps the Republcians were just happy to get the "Democrat" they wanted).

Kruger won the election and was seated.

In Kreizman’s case, he is registered to vote and presumably lives at the house of his parents in Bensonhurst, in the Senate District of Diane Savino, and at one point seems to have been keen on challenging her.

In fairness, Kreizman’s house is only in Savino’s district by one block, and most of his neighborhood is located in a different Senate District.

Marty Golden’s.

Virtually none of the neighborhood Kreizman lives in, even loosely defined, is in Kruger’s Senate district.

But why should we let that deprive us of the services of this outstanding young man who has been anointed by the best Rabbis money can buy?

None of this matters in the first election after a reapportionment, when Kreizman would be allowed to run anywhere in Brooklyn his Party desires, but if there’s a special election, Kreizman cannot legally be a candidate.

Unless, he’s thinking of retaining Farouk Samaroo as his election lawyer.

More likely, the Republicans are just confident that Kruger will not resign before his term ends; perhaps they've even gotten a promise from him–surely, it would not be the first time Kruger's made a deal with them.  

LIKE KRUGER, Kreizman lives with a Doctor named Michael (in this case, the Michael is Fred's daddy).

Thirty two years of age seems awful old to be an Orthodox Jewish bachelor, and I hope for Fred’s sake, he does not take the rules of shomer negiah all that seriously (from all appearances, Fred never takes any rule all that seriously), but if he does, the lack of intimate contact with the opposite sex would be another thing he has in common with Kruger. Generally though, self professed celibates do not do all that well in Brooklyn elections.

LIKE KRUGER with his munificent bestowal of parking placards, Kreizman uses his public position to try to ensure that some people are treated more equal than others. Kreizman, along with Rabbi Leib Glanz, appears to be a key player in administering the Bloomberg adminstration's program of special treatment for Orthodox Jews charged with crimes.  

In this instance though, it appears that Kruger is the one who holds the moral high ground. In fact, one is compelled to conclude that Fred Kreizman think "Justice" is spelled "J-U-S-T–U-S"

LIKE KRUGER, Kreizman is plotting with the Senate Republicans and Dov Hikind (and probably the Garson Crime Family and other players to be named later) to steal a State Senate Seat from the Democrats. And, like in that instance, the Republicans and their allies will fight until the last dollar of your tax dollars is exhausted.

FRED KREIZMAN, southern Brooklyn’s best choice for continuity in representation.

Perhaps we should call him "Freddy Kruger."

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